Top Ten Dominant Video Game Athletes

by ryan on May 21, 2007

mvp05.jpg10. Zach Greinke (XBOX-MVP 2005). It sounds ridiculous to say that a Kansas City Royal could dominate a video game, but Zach Greinke did exactly that. His curveball was simply unhittable. I would lob this one up for about 90% of the pitches I would throw during a game, and the stuff just couldn’t be touched. It helped that it looked the exact same as his fastball, leaving your opponent flustered. If you could get around the fact that the Royals couldn’t hit, you were golden.

mvp05.jpg9. Dustan Mohr (XBOX- MVP 2005). Mohr was another shockingly dominant player on MVP 2005. The weird thing is, his dominance only came against right handed pitchers, where his entire strike zone was a “hot zone.” There is probably nothing more demoralizing than stepping up against a batter who has no area of weakness.

mariogolf.jpg8. Bowser (N64- Mario Golf). Bowser was the John Daly of Mario Golf. He could hit the ball a mile, and his short game was surprisingly good. The key was to catch him on a meltdown hole, which would happen about once a round, and then somehow hold out against him the other 17 holes. No small task.

mariotennis.jpg7. Mario & Luigi (Gamecube-Mario Tennis). When you faced these two on the highest difficulty level you pretty much lost. Many epic battles were waged against these two that would last for a great amount of time. Because they were so well rounded, on the highest difficulty level they were nearly flawless.

smackdown.jpg6. The Great Khali (XBOX 360 WWE Smackdown vs. Raw). Khali was next to unbeatable in this game. Smaller wrestlers couldn’t do anything to harm him, and he was impossible to throw over the ropes. In a Royal Rumble Khali simply couldn’t be removed, and his chop to the forehead was enough to knock any wrestler out of the ring.

ea-2002.jpg5. Marc Wilmots/Emile Mpenza (PS2- FIFA World Cup 2002): I’ve played sports video games for a long time and I have NEVER come across a team as good as Belgium in the 2002 World Cup video game. It didn’t matter who I was. I could be Brazil, France, or Argentina. If I ran into Belgium in the knockout stages of the tournament, I would lose. And I’d usually lose big. Wilmots couldn’t be tackled, he was too damn big. Mpenza couldn’t be caught, he was too damn fast. Belgium’s dominance contributed to lots of profanity that summer.

tecmo-bowl-box.jpg4. Lawrence Taylor (NES- Tecmo Bowl): The original LT was pretty tough to top. While I remember getting about 10 sacks with Matt Millen on this game, he couldn’t compare to LT’s speed and power. In a game where dominant players were completely unstoppable, Taylor made the Giants one of the best teams on the game.

punch-out-box.jpg3. Mike Tyson (NES- Mike Tyson’s Punch Out): Before Mr. Dream replaced Tyson on the game, you had to go through Iron Mike to win it all. The premise was simple: If Tyson hits you once, you’re knocked down. If Tyson hits you three times, you lose by TKO. While he wasn’t a playable character, he was as close to unbeatable as you can get. Doc couldn’t help you in this one. Little Mac was going to receive a historic ass-kicking.

nes-bases-loaded.jpg2. Paste (NES- Bases Loaded): There was lots to like about Bases Loaded. The hilarious bullpen golf carts inspired me to empty my pitching staff before I threw a single pitch. Then there was Paste, the lardass that would homer every single time he came to bat. You weren’t going to get Paste out. Your best bet was pegging him and moving on.

tecmo-bowl-box.jpg1. Bo Jackson (NES- Tecmo Bowl): I’d say this is pretty unanimous. Virtual Bo was God.

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{ 5 trackbacks }

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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Sandy Agina May 21, 2007 at 2:51 pm

ridiculous tecmo bowl run, it makes me wonder if jackson is god, or the kid playing that game is the biggest pimple dork ever..

Reply

ryan May 21, 2007 at 4:28 pm

Maybe a little of both.

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J David May 22, 2007 at 2:47 pm

That Bo Jackson video made me crack up!

Reply

AJ May 22, 2007 at 10:49 pm

Ok, first off, that Bo Jackson video was fuckin gravy….Secondly, Sandy’s comment was even funnier.

Great idea for a list, you’re really doin it.

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